RAWALPINDI – After days of weeping, imploring and begging for mercy on part of our editors, Pakistan’s Inter-Services Intelligence (ISI) has finally agreed to an editorial partnership with Khabaristan Times.
The announcement comes exactly 10 days after the senior editors of Khabaristan Times started calling up senior Army officials to save their collective backsides.
“We thought we’d call them before they called us,” reveals a senior editor at Khabaristan Times tasked with finalising the agreement with the ISI.
The senior ISI official coordinating with Khabaristan Times’ editorial staff confirms that he received 12,007 missed calls collectively from this publication’s editorial staff.
Reacting to what is henceforth a joint venture, Director General (DG) ISI Lt Gen Naveed Mukhtar congratulated Khabaristan Times’ editors on their demonstrations of self-importance.
“You’d have to have a ridiculously inflated opinion of yourself and your publication to think that you’re in any danger whatsoever,” Lt Gen Naveed Mukhtar said. “Can’t believe this group of nobodies was freaking out.”
It is pertinent to mention here that the publication couldn’t publish any news during the protracted negotiations with the ISI.
Director General Inter Services Public Relations (ISPR) Major General Asif Ghafoor announced ISI’s collaboration with Khabaristan Times on his personal and ISPR’s social media accounts.
“The ISI is proud to announce editorial partnership with yet another mainstream Pakistani publication, Khabaristan Times,” the DG ISPR tweeted.